Meet Kofi and Ama, Ghana's version of William Shakespeare's love freaks Romeo & Juliet. Their story is similar to that of the 18th century's but with lots of modern satire and from the Ghanaian perspective. I will quote the Original Act and Scene and give the Ghanaian version after. All characters are entirely fictional and any reference made to any names or tribes are purely coincidental and without malice or ill-intent. lighten up please!
Act 1 Scene 5
Kofi sees Ama whilst having a drink with his boys-boys at a house party in East Legon, and instantly his eye get!
'OMG! who is that?' he asks the waiter passing by. The waiter said he doesn't know. all of a sudden his brokenheart from his shakara ex-girlfriend Gifty is gone!
'I AM IN LOVE! My heart hasn't loved till now! He walks up to Ama and touches her hand.
'If I profane with my unworthiest hand......'
Ama stops him mid-speech, 'Excuse me! Who are you? You can't touch me just like that! And what kind of english is that?'
Kofi continues as if he hasn't heard and declares how a kiss from her would redeem him as a sinner and she a saint.
Ama is shocked! But deep inside she is secretly excited! This was unheard of! Since when did Ghana boys resort to such bluntness and forwardness? She found herself nodding. Kofi kisses her. No small kiss mind you.
'Ah! My sins have been purged!
Ama giddy from the kiss, 'Oh, you can have your sins back again if you want.'
Kofi can't believe his luck and kisses her again.
Auntie Comfort turns up to tell Ama that her mother is looking for her. Kofi asks Auntie Cee who her mother was and is devastated to find out that she was from the house of the Ofosuhene's
Yie!!!
Ama asks Auntie Cee later who the young man was. She starts praying that he isn't married!
'Oh, he is an Amegashivi XXVI , the only son of your fathers mortal enemy.
'The devil is a liar! Why must i fall in love with a person from such a family?
Act 2 Scene 2 (Balcony Scene)
Kofi sees Ama appear above at a window.
'What light appears through that window?' He asks. The light goes off.
'Oh ECG!! cries Ama.
Kofi unable to see in the dark leaves.
Ama picks up her phone and calls him. 'Kofi, O Kofi! Where are you?'
'Charle, I dey plus my boys boys having some domedo. ECG spoil matter give us kwraa! My battery is dying let me call you later. '
Kofi calls Ama the next day.
Ama asks him how he managed to get into the house the night before.
'No walls can hold back my love for you my dear. Lol! I am joking oh! I gave your watchman GhC 10 and he started bowing and scraping, calling me 'Yessa'!
'If my people catch you here, you will be killed!'
'Killed? in this present Ghana?' Sweetheart, don't mind these old people and their feuds. 'Who cares if you are an Ofosuhene? Lets get married!'
'O Kofi! Yes, i 'll marry you. I will get the bride price from Auntie Cee and whatsapp it to you. Ok? Hello, hello...?'
The conversation abruptly ends due to a network failure. Kofi called back but the service was out of coverage area.
Act 2 Scene 3
Kofi makes an appointment to meet his Pastor and Prophet NyomoWoko (God isnt asleep) to help them get married. Prophet Pastor Reverend Apostle Evangelist NyomoWoko agrees after he pays him a hefty sum of $1,000.
Act 2 Scene 5
Ama gets a BBM from Kofi that the wedding is on tonight!
Act 2 Scene 6
Pastor, Prophet...etc NyomoWoko marries the lovebirds and warns them that this sort of love is like a weapon of destruction. Too much of it can explode and make them sick in their stomachs so they should love with moderation.
Act 3 Scene 3
Meanwhile Kofi becomes a murderer and fugitive after killing his enemy Kwasi who tried to throw him out at the party at East Legon. Thus leaving Ama to think of how being a murderer's wife will feel like. Ah! These men kwraa! She starts a 3 day fasting and prayer for her husband.
Act 3 Scene 4
Meanwhile Ama's father Nana Konti had agree for Ama to be married to Kwabena, a son of his former classmate from St. Ahem Secondary School. Ama cant believe it when her father tells her this.
'Ah! Daddy! How can you do this to me? Am I a slave to be sold off without a say in my own affairs? I will go to JoyFm and expose you for this, you wait and see!'
Nana Konti flares up, 'I am your FATHER! You will do as i say! I will disown you if you dont marry him! Try me and see! You have 3 days, so better go and get ready! Nonsense. You children of today thinking you know more than your parents. mmtttsccceew!'
Act 4 Scene 1
Pastor Prophet, etc NyomoWoko concots a plan with Ama for her to drink Agbeve sleeping tonic which when she drinks will seem as if she is dead, that way she can escape the wedding.
'Oh Prophet, I never trusted you and your prophecies but this plan di33rr will work!'
Act 4 Scene 2
'Daddy, I will marry Kwabena,' Ama tells her father as he sits on the balcony drinking Henessey.
'Thats better! replies her Dad beaming. So now we can move it forward to tomorrow then!'
Shocked to her core. Ama leaves wordlessly.
Act 4 Scene 3
The Abeve sleeping tonic stands stoic by her dressing table urging her on. Ama starts wondering if the plan will work. She prays and asks for Gods protection and drinks the potion.
'Yuck! This is horrible and bitter! Ah, this Prophet kwraa, is he trying to kill me or what?'
Act 5 Scene 1
Fine Boy, a houseboy to Kofi hears that Ama has died and rushes to tell his Massa. Kofi not knowing of the plan, almost collapses and goes to buy RAT poison.
Act 5 Scene 3
Kofi meets his rival Kwabena at the cemetry where the 'dead' body of Juliet had been laid in a crypt.
'Charle, make I no bore! Please get out of my way or else...., ' cried Kofi as he held up a machete.
Kwabena sees the shiny machete and starts to squirm. He steps sideways away from the crypt and says,
' Me sef i dey go watch Man U v Barca. You can have her body. After all what!' Kwabena departs.
Kofi sees Ama lying still on the tombstone and opens the poison. As he raises it to his lips, he hesitates.
'Kofi Amegashivi XXVI, you fool? What is wrong with you? You will kill yourself for one woman?,' He asks himself loudly. 'There is loads of opportunities out there for me oh. Just last night the message i got from that girl kwraa...what's her name...yeah Marjorie tells me i got game!'
Unknown to Kofi, Ama was waking up from her sleeping tonic slumber when she heard him say the last sentence.
'Ei Kofi! So is this how you are? I sacrifice so much for you and this is how you treat me?' Ama asked as she sat up from the tombstone.
Kofi was too shocked and stood in fright looking at the resurrected Ama. He finally managed to say something, 'Oh my love. Its not me oh! Its the devil, see he even gave me this poison to drink so that we can die together.'
'But you have already started cheating on me with Marjorie! How dare you?' she screamed and flinging her hand to slap him, her hand hit the bottle sending it flying into Kofi's face! He screamed in pain and terror! He fell and died whilst writhing from the effects of the poison.
Disbelief and pain washed across Ama's face as she stared at her husband's body. She grabbed a knife (who put it there noone knows up until now) and stabbed herself in the heart! But oh! She missed! The knife was now stuck in her breastplate but nonetheless she bled profusely and died of her wounds atop her husband.
Here comes the Ofosuhene's and the Amegashivi's to the gory and tragic scene and the wailing starts!
'Ewurade ei, oh Ewurade ei!'
'Mawu oh, Mawu oh!'
The story of Kofi and Ama became a lesson for both families and they tried to reunite based on their children's death.
Moral of the story? (Create one yourself) :)